After nearly fifty years of seemingly flawless marriage, Henry decided it was finally time to clear the air of any lingering secrets before their big golden anniversary.
Sitting together on the porch, he took his wife’s hand and looked tenderly into her eyes. “Martha, we’ve shared half a century together, but there’s one question that’s been eating away at me. Have you ever… been unfaithful to me?”
Martha looked down, her face flushing, and sighed softly. “Well, Henry, if I’m being completely honest with you… yes. I’ve been unfaithful three times over the last fifty years. But I swear, it was always for a very good reason.”
Henry’s heart sank, but swallowed his pride, deeply curious. “Three times? Okay… can you tell me what those ‘good reasons’ were?”
“Of course,” Martha nodded. “The first time was right after we got married. We were about to lose our little house because we couldn’t pay the mortgage. Do you remember that evening I went to see the banker alone, and the very next morning he mysteriously notified you that our loan had been extended?”
Henry recalled the miracle extension and cleared his throat. “I… I do remember. You sacrificed your virtue to save our home. I can forgive you for that. But what about the second time?”
“Do you remember when you were desperately ill, and we didn’t have a single penny to pay for the emergency heart surgery you needed?” Martha asked softly. “Well, I went to visit your chief surgeon one night, and if you recall, he performed the entire operation completely free of charge.”
Tears welled up in Henry’s eyes. “My sweet Martha, you did that to save my life. Of course I can forgive you. You are a saint. But please, tell me about the third time.”
Martha took a deep breath, looked him straight in the eye, and said:
“Well, do you remember last year when you ran for President of the local golf club, and the committee told you that you were trailing behind and needed exactly 73 more votes?”
Henry fainted.
